Goodbye Apple

Relax, Gweneth's Apple is fine.

I'm talking about my dear Granny. Granny Smith.

I read on one of my band boards last week that apples are not very band friendly. The skin gets caught. Today I forgot to bring my breakfast to work, and I was really hungry, so I saw a pair of apples next to the refrigerator, and being the subtle bloak that I am, I approached the pairs owner, and said, "So, I notice you have *two* apples!"

"Do you want one?" she laughed.

"Well were you planning on eating *two* apples today?" I inquired.

"No, I forgot I already had one here - have it!!"

I did.

[Disclaimer: For those of you reading my blog who do not know me (and God bless you for finding this somehow interesting - my own Mother reads this in place of taking her ambien), I must explain that I'm really not one of *those* people. I'm not a mooch. I don't like free things. I am not cheap. I don't usually approach my coworkers begging for food, the way my cat greets all of my guests. The apple asking incident was one that occurred with a dear friend of mine, who still somehow, finds me charming and amusing. This was all in good fun.]

I crunched into the apple, and the first bite went down. Silly bandsters...I thought to myself...

I took a second bite, and it felt a little weird. I ignored it.

Third time's a charm they say... by the third bite I was making my way to the bathroom to spit it up.

It's the skin. The rest is fine, but when on earth would I have time to skin an apple?! There are plenty of other fruits that I love. I'm sorry, dear apple, but you just don't have what it takes to be the next American Id... Oh, sorry, I dozed off.

Anyway, out with the apple, in with the watermelon! Welcome summer!!